Therapy is now increasingly accepted in India as a source of 'treatment' for specific mental health difficulties, such as schizophrenia, clinical depression, anxiety and trauma, yet we are far from identifying it as a routine form of self-care for emotional and psychological well-being.
Therapy is often considered a last resort when crisis hits and you’re at your breaking point. Perhaps this is a systemic issue, one that stems from often being raised to believe that “you should keep problems within the family", "just get on with it", "cheer up", or" don’t think about your problems”. Thus, it is often a fear of judgment and/or fear of the unknown or the outside world that prevents us from seeking external or professional help, until we just don't see any other way forward.
Contrary to popular belief, therapy doesn’t need to be the place you go when something is wrong; it is also a preventive process, a space where you can reflect on yourself, your thoughts, feelings, beliefs, values, strengths and goals. It is a form of upkeep, a place to learn how your life experiences have shaped who you are and what specific skillset can help you maintain good mental health. More importantly, these are often “normal” problems that a majority of us face. For example, our unique life experiences cause our brains to develop in a way where we learn to take in information, opinions or ideas that fit with it. As a result, we develop biased ways of thinking about ourselves, others and the world, which may cause us to get stuck in specific thought patterns. Going to therapy can help you become aware of these patterns, learn ways to adapt them and think more flexibly, before they begin to have an adverse impact on your sense of self, relationships and everyday life.
It may be simple lifestyle choices that you need a push to implement in your daily routine (like working out and sleeping well) or a more complex conversation where you need to face issues you are otherwise unlikely to confront. Maybe you’ve been feeling low on self-confidence and notice this has an impact on your performance at school or the workplace. Maybe you’ve been finding it difficult to make friends or are new to navigating romantic relationships. Maybe you are just looking for a sounding board, someone with impartial perspectives who can offer a different take and use creative techniques to broaden your horizons. Maybe you’ve had difficult childhood experiences or a major life transition, and they continue to have an impact on your current self and relationships too. Remember, you don't need to define your self based on the things that happened to you in the past.
When you’ve hit rock bottom, it is harder to build yourself back up. Therapy offers you a platform to focus on continually strengthening yourself and/or your relationships. This is what makes therapy an integral part of your self-care.
About the Author: Mallika Verma
Mallika Verma is a psychologist, and couples and family therapist. She has previously worked across a range of public and private healthcare settings in India and the UK. She now practices privately in Mumbai and Delhi. Learn more at: www.mallikaverma.com or get in touch with her on: mallikavermatherapy@gmail.com.
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